Saturday, August 8, 2015

Outside...




Ever so often I would get asked why can't I speak chinese?... then I would say because my parent's never spoke chinese to me as a child.... plus... I went to a private catholic school that didn't have mandarin on the curriculum...

then I would get a strange snare from the person asking  the question... who must be thinking that it is so weird.. that a chinese guy like myself can't even speak his own language...

I guess i'm sort of a BANANA then ?... (ethnic slur) is a term that denotes a betrayal of race or culture by implying that, like a banana, a person is yellow (Asian) on the outside but white on the inside.

and ever so often I would also get asked if i'm a christian?... then I would say my mom is a catholic... and my dad is a Buddhist... but I follow my mom's side and her religious beliefs... but i'm not baptized...

then I would get some un holy judgment remark from the person asking the question who shoots me and says... “then you aren't CONSIDERED a catholic if you are not baptized"... (snark snark).. (roll my eyes)

so much for believing in a higher power and having faith that's technically not "CONSIDERED" legal because I haven't gotten some holy water splashed On my forehead yet...

and ever so often... I would get asked by guys on gay social apps “you top or bottom”? … then I would say... I ain't a top...&  I ain't a bottom... and they would conclude... “oh so you are versatile?” …. and I would say... no....  I ain't versatile either... I'm just not into anal sex....

then they usually brush me off as some useless boring prude that doesn't fit into any stereo type box....

one guy in particular even asked me …  “ 1 or 0” ?  (is that supposed to be some new age way of asking the dreadful top or bottom question?) …. of course I replied sarcastically saying “ is that you asking if I have a penis or a vagina?… lol (roll my eyes...)

sigh.... anyways... moral of the blog post is...

I guess I will always be someone who is on the outside... neither here nor there... ambiguous and just someone who will never seem to fit in...

and that's not a problem... it's just the way it is....


and my soundtrack of the moment …


Mariah Carey ~ Outside

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