Saturday, August 29, 2015

4 Years Of Blogging...



4 years...

that’s a lot of blogging...

i almost didn’t realize that it was gonna be my blog’s anniversary not until i saw the word “September”  on my calendar...

well... as i  looked through the past year of posts... especially the poems.. it brings back lots of specific memories... specific moments in time... some posts in particular that i consider to be my most personal and greatest works of heart...  but once so meaningful have become quite meaningless to me...

i should tell you that sometime during this year... my inspiration to write had been totally lost... and i wouldn’t even call it a writer’s block even...  but for once... i’m not fretting bout the amount of posts i want to publish per month...  i am just letting it be.. 

if i write... i will write...

and if i don’t... i’ll just wait until i get inspired... and it usually just hits me when the right moment comes...


so... for the month of September... it’s “behind the writing” time...

Thursday, August 20, 2015

Snap 2.0...


for most ppl... they would be distracted by the cute chubby wubby baby ...

but for me... all eyes are on DA DA ! 

Sunday, August 16, 2015

Grocery Walking...



every weekend .... i like to go grocery walking at the local giant grocery store... (at night)... cuz that’s when i can drive and park the car and not have to worry about the heat and getting under the sun...

i walk around... and listen to what i am feeling at that moment... usually craving for any junk food i want to binge on especially things like potato chips in new flavors... i’ll just look around and find what i want... but i won’t necessarily get it cuz i usually think twice and trice over if i want to eat that much calories when lord knows i’m trying my hardest to lose some weight...

some nights... i’ll get lucky and catch a GLIMPSE of a guy in a tanktop... and maybe snap him from behind... so he can end up infamously on my snap 2.0 blog posts... and then other times more often than not...

i’ll notice a guy who’s just sooo darn cute that i’ll just stare adoringly at him not caring at all if i seem to be like some perverted stalker...

then walk away .. (and maybe even turn around to get a glimpse of him one last time)... as i DAY DREAM of him being my boyfriend... holding his hand and cuddling and just having a good ol time together...

then i’ll walk back to the junk food aisle and GRAB the bag of potato chips i’ve been wanting to try... (1 bag of each flavour that is...lol)

and that kinda sums up the circle of life when it comes to my grocery store walking...

i come... i glimpse... i day dream... i grab... then i EAT...


:-/

Saturday, August 8, 2015

2 Simple Questions...



Outside...




Ever so often I would get asked why can't I speak chinese?... then I would say because my parent's never spoke chinese to me as a child.... plus... I went to a private catholic school that didn't have mandarin on the curriculum...

then I would get a strange snare from the person asking  the question... who must be thinking that it is so weird.. that a chinese guy like myself can't even speak his own language...

I guess i'm sort of a BANANA then ?... (ethnic slur) is a term that denotes a betrayal of race or culture by implying that, like a banana, a person is yellow (Asian) on the outside but white on the inside.

and ever so often I would also get asked if i'm a christian?... then I would say my mom is a catholic... and my dad is a Buddhist... but I follow my mom's side and her religious beliefs... but i'm not baptized...

then I would get some un holy judgment remark from the person asking the question who shoots me and says... “then you aren't CONSIDERED a catholic if you are not baptized"... (snark snark).. (roll my eyes)

so much for believing in a higher power and having faith that's technically not "CONSIDERED" legal because I haven't gotten some holy water splashed On my forehead yet...

and ever so often... I would get asked by guys on gay social apps “you top or bottom”? … then I would say... I ain't a top...&  I ain't a bottom... and they would conclude... “oh so you are versatile?” …. and I would say... no....  I ain't versatile either... I'm just not into anal sex....

then they usually brush me off as some useless boring prude that doesn't fit into any stereo type box....

one guy in particular even asked me …  “ 1 or 0” ?  (is that supposed to be some new age way of asking the dreadful top or bottom question?) …. of course I replied sarcastically saying “ is that you asking if I have a penis or a vagina?… lol (roll my eyes...)

sigh.... anyways... moral of the blog post is...

I guess I will always be someone who is on the outside... neither here nor there... ambiguous and just someone who will never seem to fit in...

and that's not a problem... it's just the way it is....


and my soundtrack of the moment …


Mariah Carey ~ Outside

Thursday, August 6, 2015

Kiss "o" ...




haven't been much into the mood for wanking as of late...

just not feeling anything arousing looking through my vault of porn vids..

so i downloaded a new one today and tried wanking to it ...

a full 14 mins ... still nothing that gets me high to climax...

tickling... pits... bondage,... all ... the usual suspects that never fails to get me off...

but to no avail... i might as well be shooting blanks...

until...

the last 30 seconds of the 14 min video... they started to kiss...

lips interlocking like as if they were real life boyfriends...

and that was what did it for me...

"o"

(it's too apparent... what i need in my life right now)


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