Saturday, January 25, 2014

Mr. Carwash...



as i was doing my usual sunset walk around my neighbourhood... (only this time i brought along my 3 month old golden retriever puppy) on a leash for the walk with me...  i noticed something that was way beyond the corner of my eye...

a guy who seemed to be washing his car... and what really ticked off my raydar was him being completely SHIRTLESS!!!!!!!  and to add insult to horny injury... he paired his hot “shirtless” look with casual black shorts... BLACK... oh dear god... what a lethal combination... skin and black shorts... (* dramatic maiden faint)

and so i just kept my cool and walked my little cute j.lo butt on over there... nonchalantly minding my own business... obviously stealing criminalistic perverted looks in such stealth like precision his way...

his manly broad square shoulders... so broad i think of superman... his slim and fit and almost tight upper body with just a sliver of a sign of a six pack...  his honey maple syrupy skin just barely glistening in sweat ... catching the natural sheen of the setting sun light... oh and his oh so handsome youthful handsome handsome handsome face....and i even got a few glimpses of his demurely hairy pits while he was in “public armpit exposure” positions...  (awh man his pits were hot...and not to mention his skinny chicken bird legs)... hihi

this was pure perfection to me... and i say that loosely because perfection about a man’s body can be a turn off for me... that’s  why i never get high when looking at perfectly chiselled muscled men at the gym... (not that i ever used a gym in my entire life)...

then... as i was getting into close proximity of mr. carwash himself... he stopped what he was doing and noticed my cute and adorable golden retriever puppy that was by my side... and as he turned off his water hoe and slowly started making his way towards me with a big ole friendly smile on his Handsome handsome face... my heart literally felt like it was gonna melt into chocolate pudding

he said... “wow ... such a cute puppy! what breed is it?”....  as he started fondling on my puppy so coddlingly wishing it was ME he was coddling his hands on... and he knelt down on one knee... as i stole more perverted glances at his sexy tart nipples... and his beads of sweat trickling down his chest...

*** reality check ***

(well in a perfect world that is what would have happened to me... but in reality... mr. carwash didn’t even take one look at me or even my puppy... it was like we were some sort of invisible wraiths just passing not once... not twice.. but FOUR times... yep.. i made my way down his driveway FOUR FR!KIN TIMES!!!)

sigh... 

mr. carwash... why you gotta wash yo car without yo shirt on?

:-(


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